Goodbye 2009
I was thinking about the pros and cons of 2009 today, on the end of the year of course. I guess what I am thinking about mostly are the cons.
Right now, I realize that I haven't done much work since the semester ended or started rewriting thesis draft number 3. It's due in mid January anyways, but still... it would have been beneficial to start writing or at least making some work to gather ideas about what the writing IS about. But the problem is that I am spending much time at Tien''s house and it's all fun and games here. I've been mostly watching TV, movies (we saw "Avatar" in 3D today), playing Wii Fit, eating to my heart's content (how much pumpkin pie have I eaten so far?), Internet surfing (my laptop has since crashed and burned! At home, I am computerless until school starts), and reading a lot of romance novels! (Hell, I have a new favorite author, Julianne MacLean, having just read just two of her books in 4 1/2 hours each!) I guess it is okay to be a little lazy, I am on break after all!
Yesterday, Tien said I should be a teacher. I was startled by that admission. Of course, I didn't outright say that that is not what I'm interested in doing at the moment. I kept imagining my life as an instructor, settled in Dayton, Ohio and having and teaching kids, but I saw no happiness. In fact, I saw dullness and tedious boredom. My spirit is hungry for adventure. I imagine after receiving my BFA in May that I am going to go places! I wanna travel! Write books and screenplays! Heck! Is it slightly narcissistic to wanna grace the covers of Essence, Art News, and Time Magazines? I'm sure it is! But that's what I want. I crave it everyday!
So my resolutions are to......
1. Find my creativity. Even at Tien's house, lol. Such a bad thing to say that I can't seem to make work. Then again, I like making big pieces (18x24 and up)and I'm going to have to find a suitable space. Maybe I can rent a studio for a while in Dayton. Who knows? I need to find a place by next summer. That's for sure!
2. Make art that I am passionate about. I have been given lots and lots and lots of feedback from my romance novel appropriations. Teachers and fellow students have given me advice like making celebrities as the characters, give the characters a particular European period like Rococo, Baroque, or Neoclassicism, make facial portraits of the characters instead of full figurative work, make the characters even more abstract and less realistic, and keep drawing and stop painting. Heck! Now people just want me to draw self-portraits and steer away from my original concept altogether. Well, I'm not. I'm continuing doing what I'm passionate about. With all of this time, I'll make the work stronger and better because I care about it. I will probably lose every competition, but I no longer care about that. Screw what everyone else says! This is my final semester and for once, I'm taking charge. :)
3. Research art schools for grad school. I wanted to start applying next year, but I realize that application fees range from $50-$70 each and most of the applications are due in January. That leaves little time for proper research and no one wants to throw their money away on a school that turns out to be a two year mistake.
4. Corn syrup or no corn syrup. By the end of this year, I had fully decided to stop consuming foods containing CS or HFCS ( high fructose corn syrup). I stopped eating ketchup, a lot of specific chocolate bars (as of now I can only eat certain Hershey Bars and Raisinets), ice cream, certain breads, and a lot of other things. But when holidays came around, I made some instances. I've decided that this behavior is a no can do! I am rather passionate about this and can no longer go half-way.
5. Finish stories and send them out there. This is the scariest one of all and I admit, I make it every year. The fear of rejection is horrible, but I realize that I am 26. I've always wanted to write and publish novels before I die. I might as well start. Everyday, I keep having new ideas and the thought of forgetting them is just as terrifying as never publishing them.
That's my story and I'm sticking with it.
But let's not forget about the year's pros!!!!!
PARIS!!!!!! MEETING JAMES SCOTT IN BOSTON!!!! GOING TO NEW YORK!!!! MEETING EMMA CAULFIELD IN CHICAGO!!!!! AND SEEING BRITNEY SPEARS IN CONCERT!!!!!!
What will 2010 bring?
Right now, I realize that I haven't done much work since the semester ended or started rewriting thesis draft number 3. It's due in mid January anyways, but still... it would have been beneficial to start writing or at least making some work to gather ideas about what the writing IS about. But the problem is that I am spending much time at Tien''s house and it's all fun and games here. I've been mostly watching TV, movies (we saw "Avatar" in 3D today), playing Wii Fit, eating to my heart's content (how much pumpkin pie have I eaten so far?), Internet surfing (my laptop has since crashed and burned! At home, I am computerless until school starts), and reading a lot of romance novels! (Hell, I have a new favorite author, Julianne MacLean, having just read just two of her books in 4 1/2 hours each!) I guess it is okay to be a little lazy, I am on break after all!
Yesterday, Tien said I should be a teacher. I was startled by that admission. Of course, I didn't outright say that that is not what I'm interested in doing at the moment. I kept imagining my life as an instructor, settled in Dayton, Ohio and having and teaching kids, but I saw no happiness. In fact, I saw dullness and tedious boredom. My spirit is hungry for adventure. I imagine after receiving my BFA in May that I am going to go places! I wanna travel! Write books and screenplays! Heck! Is it slightly narcissistic to wanna grace the covers of Essence, Art News, and Time Magazines? I'm sure it is! But that's what I want. I crave it everyday!
So my resolutions are to......
1. Find my creativity. Even at Tien's house, lol. Such a bad thing to say that I can't seem to make work. Then again, I like making big pieces (18x24 and up)and I'm going to have to find a suitable space. Maybe I can rent a studio for a while in Dayton. Who knows? I need to find a place by next summer. That's for sure!
2. Make art that I am passionate about. I have been given lots and lots and lots of feedback from my romance novel appropriations. Teachers and fellow students have given me advice like making celebrities as the characters, give the characters a particular European period like Rococo, Baroque, or Neoclassicism, make facial portraits of the characters instead of full figurative work, make the characters even more abstract and less realistic, and keep drawing and stop painting. Heck! Now people just want me to draw self-portraits and steer away from my original concept altogether. Well, I'm not. I'm continuing doing what I'm passionate about. With all of this time, I'll make the work stronger and better because I care about it. I will probably lose every competition, but I no longer care about that. Screw what everyone else says! This is my final semester and for once, I'm taking charge. :)
3. Research art schools for grad school. I wanted to start applying next year, but I realize that application fees range from $50-$70 each and most of the applications are due in January. That leaves little time for proper research and no one wants to throw their money away on a school that turns out to be a two year mistake.
4. Corn syrup or no corn syrup. By the end of this year, I had fully decided to stop consuming foods containing CS or HFCS ( high fructose corn syrup). I stopped eating ketchup, a lot of specific chocolate bars (as of now I can only eat certain Hershey Bars and Raisinets), ice cream, certain breads, and a lot of other things. But when holidays came around, I made some instances. I've decided that this behavior is a no can do! I am rather passionate about this and can no longer go half-way.
5. Finish stories and send them out there. This is the scariest one of all and I admit, I make it every year. The fear of rejection is horrible, but I realize that I am 26. I've always wanted to write and publish novels before I die. I might as well start. Everyday, I keep having new ideas and the thought of forgetting them is just as terrifying as never publishing them.
That's my story and I'm sticking with it.
But let's not forget about the year's pros!!!!!
PARIS!!!!!! MEETING JAMES SCOTT IN BOSTON!!!! GOING TO NEW YORK!!!! MEETING EMMA CAULFIELD IN CHICAGO!!!!! AND SEEING BRITNEY SPEARS IN CONCERT!!!!!!
What will 2010 bring?
Oh Janyce, you are so beautiful <3!
ReplyDeleteI'm really inspired by your list! I want to go and make things now :D It's not so much resolutions as changes in general that can be kept as lifelong reminders.
I'm especially touched by #2...making art you're passionate about. This particular bit, ". I'm continuing doing what I'm passionate about. With all of this time, I'll make the work stronger and better because I care about it." struck me so hard because it's absolutely true. One thing I've definitely learned is that too much advice can confuse you, and cloud what it is that you initially set out to do. YOu've got to follow the path your own way and go with your instincts...only you know what's inside of yourself! I totally understand where you've coming from <3
Jels,
ReplyDeleteYou better make work you're passionate about!!!! And I thought you were doing that anyways. I loved the work you displayed in your senior show, so amazing to me. You stayed to your Lincoln guns even when others couldn't fathom your love. It inspired me to do what I WANT and not what someone else wants me to do. I thank you for that. Being true to yourself is the best reward in an artistic career.
And you're beautiful too, Jels. Inside and out!
<333333
Janyce
P.S. I also have holiday treats, I have to send to you as soooon I have time to get to a post office. There's not one here in Cincy, but when I go back to Dayton, I'll be sure to mail it. :D
Janyce! :D
ReplyDeleteAw..... <3 thank you so much. That's such a sweet compliment! The thing is, even when I was doing the Lincoln work, I was still constantly doubting myself and maybe taking people's comments too much to heart. It's an ongoing struggle I think, to stay true to yourself. it's amazing how hard it is to not be swayed!
You're absolutely right. We started making art because it was a part of ourselves that urged coming out and being expressed. When you start pinching and prodding that natural desire and need, it becomes distorted and in a way not as pure. Of course it's ok to take some criticisms on board if they ring true with you, but there's a difference between taking things on board and totally changing what it is that you want.
Art is so hard, in a way, don't you think? I think it is because it'sd such an intimate part of who you are, and thusly very precious and in ened of protection :D
Ooh la la! I'm working on something to add to your building package-in-waiting as well (LOL that sounds like something from your romance novels!). It's my goal to send it Feb 13, this way I can make it truly epic!
That raspberry chocolate bar you sent me before has me now officially obsessed with raspberries by the way, so now I'm worried! LOL
so much loves, my darling friend!
<3
Jels